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So my wife and I went out to the fairgrounds the other day for the 8th Annual Chili Cook off. We rolled up on our bikes (No, I have not gotten a DUI recently...) and started to lock them up. I stood there and almost had a heart attack. Not because I had to ride my bike over the freeway bridge (but damn, couldn't they put a tow-rope up there?), but I almost had a heart attack because there were TWO events at the fairgrounds!
On the other side was a dog show. Or actually, dog agility trials. That's where they have the dogs running an obstacle course, jumping over sticks, running into tunnels, etc. etc. And completely insane people who love dogs more than what can be considered 'healthy'. Well my brain damn near froze up. I was left with a real dilemma: go to the chili cook off, or go to the dog show? I really had to think about it. So I did what I always do when there is some tough thinking to be done - I went off looking for something to eat. On the far end of the cook off, they had a booth that was selling 'regular' food, like hamburgers, sodas, etc. I stood there stupefied for a minute, thinking to myself, "I need help here...I need a sign. What should I do? " Just then the lady at the window says, "What can I get you?"
"Why don't you do both?" She asks. Silly lady, she knows NOTHING of the complexity of life. Some things just don't go together. It's like pantyhose and shorts. Certain things just don't belong together. How could I do a story about chili and dogs? Ha! Everyone knows that chili and dogs don't go together! So I took the last bite of my chili-dog, and....WAIT! A Chili-Dog? Did you say Chili AND Dog? Hell, if Der Weinerscnitzel can put them together, that's enough for me (I do have a weiner-dude attitude) That's it, that's the sign I needed- my chili dog....I can do both things!
This picture shows just about everything that was happening with the dogs, they had to run through an obstacle course which included jumps (what the dog is going over now) and tunnels (you can see that on the left.) When you watch these dogs in action, it is pretty obvious that they REALLY like doing this. Some of the dogs bark during their entire run..and all of them stand on the starting line looking at their owner like they're saying, "Can I go now? Is it time yet? Can I go? Are we ready? Can I go? "
This is Nellie and P-Nut. ("Pee-dash-Nut" Nellie told me) Nelli and P-Nut actually came for the chili cookoff, but then went over to see the dog show. Nellie was the most dedicatd dog owner I met all day, even more dedicated than the dog show people. P-Nut is 9 months old, "Born and raised in Woodland. He's a Woodland dog. He weighs 5 1/4 pounds." He's a really nice dog, "oh, he loves people. We take him everywhere. We've taken him to church, and he was blessed by Father John." "It's such a comfort to have a dog, it's really good for people who need love, because P-Nut really loves me."
As interested as I was in the dogs, I didn't take too many pictures...because there were even more interesting things over in the chili area. People.
The R.H. Philips Winery was sponsoring one of the chili booths- they had salsa too. But they had a good plan, girls in short skirts advertising their booth, trying to get people's choice votes. Their chili was good too. But to the guys in the picture...do you really think you have a chance?
I like girls in short skirts as much as the next guy (or at least 90% of the next guys) but I think this may have been going overboard just a little bit. Once the Butterfield Electric people found out that sex can sell anything, including chili, they threw this guy out there. Strangely, they actually won the 'Best Yolo County Chili' award. Evidently there are a lot more freaky people in this town than I thought. But then again, the grass skirt and shell bikini top left just enough to the imagination that I was curious too...
A lot of the chili teams had descriptive names, like 'Double Flush' or 'Fartin Sparks.' This guy is from J.R.'s Rough N Ready Chili. Hmmm...Maybe it should have been "J.R.'s Sleepy-time Chili"
This booth had a theme, and it wasn't sex, but it was a great booth, with some great chili. It was the Woodland Health Care group, so of course the M*A*S*H theme was a good tie-in. Even though their theme wasn't sexual, I did watch one of the women take off her pantyhose while sitting in the booth. (!) No offense to any of the other competitors...but the M*A*S*H ladies made my favorite chili,
That's Eva on the left, and her future mother-in-law on the right. They were out there serving up 3 kinds of salsa. (In fact, their salsa ended up being my favorite...) I asked them what made their salsa so good: "It's made with love" Eva said..."And experience" her future mother-in-law added. "We use our hands so we can feel the texture. You just know when it's ready. We're always tasting it." Imagine the pressure on Eva...at a competition, making salsa with her future mother-in-law...using the secret recipe to carry on the family tradition. Man, that is pressure. Guys, I would say that is about the same as golfing in a tournament with your future father-in-law...who is really into golf, and who never loses. You've only brought one sleeve of balls, and already hit two into the water before the 5th hole. That kind of pressure.
This is Heidi, who unfortunately is from Vacaville. She told me that the M*A*S*H chili was her favorite. And that the best salsa was at 'booth number 30'. Well, I have no idea which booth that was, but Yay! for booth #30.
Jennifer (who also works for the Sheriffs, but didn't expand beyond the fact that she does not work in Animal Control) liked the Big Kahuna chili. "Very unique, very different. I also really liked the pineapple salsa."
This guy - Philip - said "This is my first time here, but it seems like a great place to be. I could smell the chili when I walked in, the atmosphere is wonderful." Yes...I had to look it up, but it is a name from the bible. It also means 'Friend of Horses.' Philip was one of the 12 apostles. I also found out that the apostles are a little bit like the Beatles. Once Judas was booted out, they replaced him with Matthias. Okay, if you want to know more, I suggest you ask someone much more informed than me.
Suzanne is a new photographer at the Daily Democrat. She was born and raised in Woodland but moved away for a while and went to UC Santa Barbara. I wanted to know why she came back..."I had to move away to really appreciate Woodland." She was not eating chili, but I would guess that her favorite chili was the one with the best lighting.
This is Sal, "Born and raised in Woodland." (Just like P-Nut!) He was a fireman here for 25 years. He's also done a few other things, he had a hot-dog cart in Dixon. "Yeah, you get to meet a lot of people with that- it's fun." Now he also does artistic etching on glass for his company Glass Eye. I asked him why he spent so much time riding his motorcycle (put your mouse on the picture to see it). "A bike is freedom. A lot of people say that, but it's true. And someone talks to you no matter where you go. It's interesting." Well, I talked to Sal, but not because of his motorcycle. I talked to him because he was a big guy, holding a little cup with a picture of a monkey on it.
I asked these guys which chili they liked the most, and Thomas pointed over to the Savage Cycles chili. "That shit over there was really hot...." Then he looked around the fairgrounds, and something caught his eye..."I like it here, but clowns really scare me."
Well that's it - the 2005 Chili Cook Off. Chili, dogs, girls, bears,
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On one side we had the chili cook off. Booths full of chili, salsa, cornbread, and (fairly) sane people to talk to.
So my wife and I sat down and she watched me start to eat. She didn't get any food, because she was planning on testing a lot of chili. "Why let that stop you?" I asked. She looked down at my belly...and I just took another bite of my chili dog. Between bites I told her, "Wow, this is really bad...like the day that the Scottish Games and Rose Tour happened at the same time. How in the world could I decide between old ladies in big hats, and guys in skirts? Now I have to decide between food, and watching dogs jump over sticks."
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