Golf has traditionally been one of the most refined, and elite games out there. Before Tiger Woods came around, it was always considered a "rich white man's sport". Now it's a sport where rich white guys are pissed that Tiger Woods ever started playing. Golf has become a sport for the common man. And the common man needs a place to play.

I've got a friend who plays golf pretty frequently, and when I ask him where he plays, the answer is usually 'down the street'. The place down the street is named 'Mountain Valley Golf Center'.

Mountain Valley Golf Center is on Road 102, just South of Gibson. While the course is small- just 9 very short holes, and the place isn't 'fancy' at all, it is pretty full service. They've got a driving range, a golf course (9 holes) a pro-shop, and all kinds of stuff. Heck, instead of telling you, just take a look at their price board.

This picture was taken in December 2004- in the summer they are open from 6:00 am to 9:00 pm.

I think it is pretty cool that you can 'rent a hole'. In fact, while I was on the course I notice this one green that had three pins on it, with different colored flags. I thought that maybe it was like a miniature golf hole, and you could take your pick. But that is the hole you can rent. You rent the hole (90 yards) and you get a bunch of balls, and a shag bag for just $10 per hour.

They've got a pro-shop, with balls, shirts, drinks, etc. They rent out clubs, carts- everything you need to come out and start golfing.

I interviewed one golfer on the practice green- a guy named Anthony. My assistant tried to take his picture, but evidently there was some difficulty understanding what 'push the little silver button on the camera' means. So, unfortunately this is the only picture I have of him. But here is what he had to say:

Do you mind if I use your picture- or did you lie to your wife and tell her you were at work? No, it's okay.

Where do you work? California Homes, we built a bunch of houses right over there (points over near the Bel Air). I'm a customer service rep. I make sure that everything in the house is okay after the new owners move in. We really try to make sure everything is okay.

How often do you play golf out here at Mountain Valley? I play about 3 times a week, more or less depending on how busy I am at work. I usually play at lunch. Sometimes I play a round or two, sometimes I only have time to get on the range. Usually a round only takes about an hour, but sometimes I'll get behind somebody slow and it takes longer.

So how do you shoot? My best round is a 32, but I usually shoot a 36 or 35.

Where else do you play? Sometimes I play down there at Davis Muni, or up in Arbuckle. The Arbuckle course is awesome, because if you go during the week you usually have the course all to yourself.

What do you think is missing at Mountain Valley? I wish it was 18 holes, but it's mostly a training center, so that's okay. And I wish they would turn the driving range lights on earlier at night- they would get a lot more people out here if the lights were on.

Do you live in a California Home? No...

Three things to say about Anthony. First, he was a nice guy. Second, I was impressed with how he was portraying his company (California Homes) he really talked a lot about their customer service, AND he was wearing a 'California Homes' hat. Third, when I was out on the course, I saw him and his cousin playing on hole next to mine. I watched him pitch-in from about 20 yards away for a birdie. Very nice shot.

Mountain Valley has a driving range, which is lit at night (though maybe they don't turn the lights on early enough). Also, you hit the ball off real grass, not one of those fake little mats. That's pretty nice, and surprising. Personally, I only hit about 15 balls at the range because I want to 'save my good shots for the course.' The lady working in the pro-shop said that they sell about 50-60 buckets of balls per day on the weekend. I did not see the little cart that drives around to pick up the balls, which is everyones favorite target. But they did have a big piece of wood out there with a picture of Osama Bin Laden to aim at.

Because the course is in Woodland it isn't very hilly. They've got a few trees out there as obstacles, but since it is a training course, they try to keep the frustrations down. They do have 4 small lakes (ponds?) on the course. I managed to hit a ball in each one of them, which was surprising because I never hit it into the lake that bordered the hole I was actually playing on.

I'm not too afraid of these lakes though, yes I hit 4 balls into the water, but the water is pretty safe- just some birds and ducks. A few years ago I played on a course in Florida that had alligators in the lakes. Yes, real live, man-eating alligators. I was very afraid of those water hazards. The course listed some 'guidelines to living with gators' to help golfers out.

• Leave alligators alone. Don't kill, harass, molest or attempt to move alligators. The potential for being bitten or injured by a provoked alligator is high. (And these people are afraid of earthquakes?!?)
• Closely supervise children when playing in or around water that might have alligators. Never allow small children to play by themselves near water that might have alligators.
• Never remove any alligators from their natural habitat or accept one as a pet. Alligators do not become tame in captivity and handling even small ones may result in bites.
• Seek immediate medical attention if you are bitten by an alligator. Alligators harbor a very infectious bacteria, and even minor bites may require special treatment.
• Never feed or entice alligators - it’s dangerous. Alligators overcome their natural shyness and become accustomed or attracted to humans when fed.
  
  We don't have alligators in Woodland yet- but if you ever come across one, now you are prepared.

Mountain Valley is advertised as a training center- where people can come out to learn how to play golf, or better players can come out and work on their short game. This group was out smacking the ball around, looking like they were having a good time. According to Pam in the pro shop, Mountain Valley is "Good for beginners to practice and learn, good for others to practice, and great for families- juniors are only $5. And we welcome walk-alongs."

Personally, I really like the walk along thing- I wanted to take my assistant with me, but she had no interest in golfing- she just wanted to go for a walk basically. But she just came along anyway- most courses don't allow this but Mountain Valley does. She soon learned the meaning of the word 'caddy'.

Golfing teen style...reading 'Cosmo Girl' wearing a 'really cute jacket' and listening to headphones. (Sorry about ruining the outfit with the backpack, that was my fault) Actually, she hit 3 balls on the driving range, and said that it was enough. It was fun to have someone else out there with me though. (On the right you can see the jacket without the backpack- isn't the fur collar cute? And those are American Eagle jeans...don't get them confused with her other 14 pair (yes really- 14 others) of jeans- somehow they are different)

Of course I went out to Mountain Valley to play a round of golf. I used to play golf a lot, once or twice a week for about 4 years or so. Eventually I noticed I wasn't getting better, I was just getting worse. It was slightly depressing. But the last straw, and what caused me to quit playing golf for about 8 years came when I was teaching a friend. A buddy of mine wanted to learn to play golf, so I rounded up some of my spare clubs, a bunch of balls, and we went out and hit the course. I taught him about the different clubs, how to hit the ball, etc. Of course in his very first game, he beat me. That's when I decided it was time to hang it up. Maybe I should just be a teacher?

Lining for for this shot, I feel good about it. I've got a wide fairway, it's straight and flat. I have a good swing...and once again, the damn ball went straight into the lake over to my left.

This score didn't include the 4 lost balls...but we don't really need to count those, do we?

After hitting the ball into water 4 times, I thought of the sand trap as a 'defensive strategy'. On the left: This was after a chip- I two-putted after this. Really...2 putts to go 5 inches.

Every single trashcan I have seen at every single golf course I have ever played on looks exactly the same. Lots of Budweiser cans, and a few boxes from golf balls. Budweiser is always the most popular beer. Is it the most popular beer for golfers everywhere? Or just the courses I go to? You can see on the sign that Main Street Market & Liquor will give you 10 percent off your purchase, if you show them a scorecard. I think that a 12 pack of Bud is about $8. So lets say that 4 teenagers come to Mountain Valley to play golf, they are juniors so they can play for only $5. Then those same teenagers go over to Main Street Liquor and pick up four 12 packs of Bud. Let's see what that comes out to: 4 Rounds of Golf $20 4 12 Packs of Bud (-10% scorecard discount) $28.80 Chance of 'scoring' after getting girlfriend drunk Good Cost of dropping out of high school, getting crappy job and never getting an education because you had to support yourself, a wife, and child since the age of 18. You Blew It

At the end of the day, this is what it's all about. Kicking back on the deck, watching the other hacks tee-off, and talking about those two or three really good shots you had. I asked these guys if they minded their picture on the site, their response was "We're old enough now that it's okay for our wives to know we're sittin' around wasting time"

This dog was in a truck in the parking lot. I think it may have been friendly, but I didn't want to sacrifice one of my putting hands to find out.

	From:  Duke Nicholls - Date: 07-Dec-04
	I read your article, and I'm glad you had some time to stop by and play some golf. During the spring time we are building seven new tees so golfers can play 18 holes while playing from different tees, also new carpet for the pro shop, new signage, 125 trees. The soils are so alkaline we can only plant beefwoods,I'm sorry I didn't get to meet you, I would have showed you the video center which has some of the most sophisticated equipment for teaching. Hopefully you can stop by in the spring when everthing is growing and green. Thanks Duke Nicholls P.G.A. Professional-owner
	From:  M.e. - Date: 11-Dec-04
	I think the reason for the Budweiser is that bottles usually aren't allowed. You can get Newcastle in the can at Davis Muni. An experience not unlike going to the Yolo Landfill in your BMW.
	From:  Krazy Tony - Date: 07-Jan-05
	Yoh, Dude This is a great course, last time there I hit a 25!!!! Not quite that good on the second hole.
	From:  Mike - Date: 14-Apr-05
	I love this course. I have taught two of my children to play here, and this is the first place I came to play again after my knee surgery. The course is challenging yet fun, and the practice green with the giant trap is excellent for practice. My only advice is to watch for ducks on their final approach to a landing in the pond, and if you tend to hit to the right, bring some extra balls with you.
	From:  Clint - Date: 22-Nov-05
	Great course, friendly People, what more could you ask for? Free Beer?
	From:  Flop dog - Date: 27-Sep-06
	I used to come out here and hit flop shots for hours every afternoon. Too bad my long game is non-existant.
	From:  Chuck Woodbury - Date: 17-Feb-08
	My daughter lives in Woodland and sent me this site. Very interesting. I will play this course while visiting her one day. It reminds me a lot of my home course here in Willits, Brooktrails Golf Course, a neat little nine hole course set among the beautiful Redwoods. A great place to practice your draw and fade to avoid hitting trees. And yes, Budweiser is the most popular beverage in the trash cans. I know as I recycle all the cans and bottles and use the funds for improvement projects on the course. Come and play with us one day.
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